Casualties of Progress

Very few people that come across my path can tell by looking at and speaking with me that I was originally born in Jamaica, West Indies.  When people say that I don’t have an accent, my usual retort is that, “I was Jamaican when Jamaican wasn't cool!”  When I first arrived in the United States (US) in the mid-seventies, my accent was very strong and was often ridiculed; therefore, I had to learn how to imitate the American accent quickly so as to not stand out as a “foreigner”.  Well…“What does that have to do with casualties of progress?” you may be thinking.  Let me explain.

I was born in November of 1966 in Jamaica to parents that did not have a sprawling estate, a car to drive, or even an apartment or house of their own.  After a year of birth my Mom desired a better life for us.  Therefore, she was able to secure a visa to gain entry into the United States in hopes of one day bringing the entire family there.  Unfortunately, it took four additional years for that to be accomplished. 

What did that mean?

This meant that I did not have my Mom around me for four of my critical years of development.  Little did I know the impact that would have on me as an adult.  I also found out that my Dad would leave six months at time to do what they called “farm work” in the US; thereby relegating us (me along with my brother and sister) to be passed around to various relatives for upbringing.  Wow!  Now just imagine what a young child is experiencing not having his mother around for four years and not seeing his dad but periodically.  Although I’m sure some of you that are reading this may have experienced even worse situations, there is a point to my story.

My Mom and Dad desired better for us as their children than they had or could financially provide.  They wanted us to be in an environment where we could learn, apply, and grow beyond anything that they had seen thus far in their lifetime.  It was because of those desires that the tough decision to leave us was made.  However, that decision to position us for progress produced certain casualties in the lives of their children.

The nature of war indicates that there will be certain causalities–those killed, injured or displaced by war. The same can be said of progress–there will be casualties.  In order for something to live, oftentimes something has to die whether physically or spiritually.  A seed must first die in order for that tree to emerge and live.

I had to understand that although my feelings of abandonment and rejection were valid, they were part of the casualty in the journey of progress that my parents had to take in order for me to have the access I have today.  I had to admit, confront, and deal with those feelings of abandonment and rejection along with their lingering impact on my life.  I also began to understand and appreciate the lessons learned along the journey of progress.  Had my Mom decided to stay in Jamaica, many of the opportunities and experiences that I now share with my children would be quite different. 

Would I have loved to have both parents active in all of my years of life?  Absolutely!  However, because my Mother took that risk (not that she wanted to, but in her mind–had to) over forty-something years ago, today she and my Dad are able to see their children live productive lives at a level far above their ceiling.  That Jamaican boy with the funny accent in the mid-seventies is now an American citizen, Motivational Speaker, Trainer, and Growth Coach with children of his own.

What tough decisions are you making that will position you or your family for greatness?

What casualties have you endured so that you or your posterity can be positioned for progress?

Progress is not free.  The question is, “What price are you willing to pay?”

Aim High…

© 2012 Aldean Pearson

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Aldean “Al” Pearson is a Professional Speaker, Trainer, and Perspective Coach.  He is the Co-Founder of the LĪVE! movement, a speaking, training and coaching organization committed to developing extraordinary people, families, and businesses. His “up-front and candid,” yet at times humorous approach empowers his clients and audiences to look past their limitations to find the hidden gems of capability within. He is married with twin boy and girl. 
Contact: AlPearson1@gmail.com

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